My husband and I originally wished to create one family, but we ended up with three!
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When Miguel and I lived in Vermont, we were foster parents for a number of young children.
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In 2002, my late husband and I decided it was time to start a family.
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I was adopted at birth and always knew that I wanted to do the same to build my own family one day.
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In 2005, I was allowed to be a Foster Parent but not able to adopt any of my children.
Read MoreMy wife and I adopted our first child in July, 2018.
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I would not have the beautiful family I have today if we were not able to foster to adopt our daughter.
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In the wake of the national trauma of September 11, 2001, we, like many other Americans, found ourselves in a period of reevaluating our lives.
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For the most part, we received tremendous support from friends, family, and most care providers throughout the adoption process. Ours was a parental placement open adoption. The first time we experienced discrimination was when it was time to take our newborn daughter home from the hospital.
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Peter and I had been together 5 years, but it was not yet legal in NY for a gay couple to adopt. I made an inquiry through the Council on Adoptable Children (COAC). Because I was a social worker, I knew that there were many children in the public system that needed a loving home, so we decided to pursue public not private adoption.
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My wife and I live in Jenkintown, Pennsylvania. My wife is an emergency medicine physician and I formerly worked in the pharmaceutical industry but with the birth of our first daughter in June 2015, I became a stay at home mom. From the beginning, creating a family and children has been a cornerstone of our relationship, and being parents to our 2 daughters brings us immense joy.
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“Can you take a 13-year-old Caucasian boy?” I got the call in my office, just after lunch. It was the call my wife and I had been waiting for–our first foster placement. It caught me at work, my wife incommunicado at her job for the afternoon. But foster care training had emphasized checking in with each other every morning on whether we would be open to a placement that day, so that whoever got the call could say yes or no on the spot. I was ready.
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My boyfriend and I first attempted to adopt in 2006. We identified a child for adoption who had lived in an institution far from NYC in western New York State, and whose parents were no longer fighting for custody. We had a home study, were fingerprinted, and were given a green light, so we contacted the county worker in charge of the 8-year-old boy we hoped to adopt. We'd had MAPP training, but were otherwise not being advised or coached or helped. We were instructed to make the six-hour drive to meet the child.
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My name is Orion Olsen, I am twenty years old, and I am transgender male. At the age of 4 years old, I was adopted out of the foster/child welfare system. Previous to that I had been in two other foster care placements, and my biological home.
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“Allowing state laws to exclude potential adoptive and foster parents because of their marital status, sexual orientation, or gender identity is not in the best interests of the child and reduces access to permanent, loving homes for these children. “
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“It is comforting to know that during such an important time we do not need to hide who we are or worry that someone along the way will use their personal bias to determine we are unworthy parents for our daughter. It is also heartbreaking to know that while there are thousands of children in need of great homes like ours, many potential LGBT parents are unable to open their hearts and their doors to these children due to the discrimination that remains throughout the system.”
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“In the two years it took to become his dads, he had become accustomed to calling us daddy and papa. Our happiest moment was the day that we got to tell him that we were going to be more than his foster dads. He was ecstatic when he found out that he didn't have to leave and that we would be a forever family!”
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“It pains me greatly to have worked for an agency that would discriminate against my daughter and others just because of the person that they love.”
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“Five years after obtaining a civil union and then a marriage license, we started the process all over with a new agency. We were welcomed with open arms. New forms were printed without 'mother and father,' but rather 'parent A and parent B'. We now have three beautiful adopted children.”
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“Children like my daughter need homes. They need a chance. Same sex couples offer as much love and safety as a heterosexual couple. We have strength, and love and conviction and these children need us. There are so many children in care, we shouldn't be turning away any homes. “
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